At this morning’s team meeting*, one of my favorite employees said the following:
“If they’re not giving us vanilla creamer, they’re not giving us meth!” I’m not going to give any context here, I’m just going to let that quote percolate in your brain on its own for a while.
However, the staff I quoted noticed me writing down her words and said: “I bet Hilary has a blog where she posts all of the stupid shit we say on it.”
I am pretty sure she doesn’t know that I actually do have a blog where I write down all of my crazy work and life exploits. So I was faced with a dilemma: Confess or just laugh along with everyone else. The moral high ground would certainly be to confess and ask permission every time I wrote a story about them.
So, instead, I laughed awkwardly and said “If I had a blog about this place it would be co-opted** into a book so fast that, well, uh… I’d be very rich.” And then I awkwardly laughed some more.
So, publishers, let’s get busy on this co-opting business, shall we?
*Next week at our meeting we will be doing a teambuilding excercise called “Twerk or Plank” it’s like truth or dare but, well, isn’t it self explanatory? Of course, if anybody gets hurt there will absolutely not be any Twerker’s Compensation. Bud-dum-bum-psh!
**I have no idea if “co-opted” is being used appropriately here. It seems legit though, so I’m not going to look it up.