The Obligatory Chupacabra Post

When my boss, AwesomeSauce, first became my supervisor she seemed to be a very stoic, almost humorless person. That was four years ago. We have both come a long way since then but I’m starting to think that maybe she’s picked up a little too much of my craziness.

It starts with a need to train employees about where our blood spill kit is located. Every year we ask a few staff where the kit is and every year they fail to know that we have a blood spill kit. It’s understandable, I mean in the grand scheme of things it’s not a very important piece of information. Unless, of course, you need it. Hence, the need to educate staff on its location.

We wanted to make the training fun so that it would be memorable and since it was October we figured we could use some fake blood from a Halloween store.

Well, October is also The Great Shake Up – on October 17th at 10:17am (the anniversary of the 1989 Loma Prieta earthquake) everyone is supposed to have an earthquake drill. Just for the heck of it we decided to throw in a dangerous person drill. We did this a few months ago and had a staff member walk around with a fake knife and we tried to evacuate everyone – it was a total bust as our intercom system failed to work and our dangerous person enjoyed her role a little too much and thought it would be fun to fake stab as many people as possible.

I swear I was joking when I suggested we throw a chupacabra into the mix. However, AwesomeSauce’s eyes lit up and she got really, really excited. Apparently, AwesomeSauce came of age in New York in the 80’s when the legend of the chupacabra became big in the Puerto Rican community. She’s always wanted a t-shirt that said: “I survived the chupacabra” (which I quickly ordered for her upcoming birthday).

After hammering out a few details, this is what we planned: An earthquake occurs and triggers PTSD in a dangerous person who just happens to have a chupacabra. They set the Chupacabra loose on our unsuspecting staff. With a trail of (fake) blood, staff will have to find the blood spill kit and clean it up. A questionnaire will be passed out afterwards with a bonus chupacabra question.

It’s days like this that I realize why I haven’t left my company for another workplace. That, and I have no skills that would make me attractive to any other employer. But, whatever…

Follow-up: We totally chickened out and just sent out a questionnaire saying: “A chupacabra attacked what do you do?” And then we offered prizes for the first 10 people to turn their questionnaires in correctly. At least the planning was fun.

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